shifting energies

I’m done with pumping as of yesterday. It’s sucked up so much energy during the day for the past months while I balance work and home life, and after my surgery, my supply was down. It seemed like a natural point – Ollie’s 10 months tomorrow – to just nurse morning and night. With Evie, I nursed four-ish times a day until she started daycare at a year; but once she started going, I didn’t pump to make up for it. I nursed her until two and a half, well into our global pandemic life, and would be happy to do the same with Ollie. But the pumping multiple times a day while trying to work a meeting heavy job is not for me anymore. And that’s ok. Balancing combo feeding (aka some formula and some breastmilk) is what works for us. And so, we shift energy to other things.

back to basics

I got my gallbladder out this week and I’ve done some more sleeping and some more resting and sitting. When I am healing I tend to pull back from all things and bubble myself into a time. A book, a story, a show. Nothing too contemporary, nothing in the news. Certainly no email. No newsletters. Some mindless internet scrolling to be sure, but nothing below the surface because I am living in the moment.

I once had a boss who told me she didn’t understand I truly needed to disconnect over the weekend. I think it was that job and that role but it still is true – I shut down parts of my world when I’m focusing on others. I don’t know how to float between both, so I do a complete switch and can’t lift the veil until I’m meant to be fully somewhere else.

So before I get back into the world, for now I am reading, drinking coffee, and noticing the nature, as always. I hope you are too.

on three words i try not to say.

As you get older and you have little people (aka nephews/nieces/friends’ babies) around that you want to help grow up loved and smart and happy, you start to notice the way people use their words.

I’ve always been a stickler for grammar and word usage, but as I get older, here are some words I’d wish people would use less:

  • Jealous. I hear 100 times a day “I’m so jealous!” of someone’s brunch, trip to a far-off land, weekend afternoon off, manicure, new jeans, etc. I hate that word. Don’t be jealous, be proud/appreciative/happy for them. And mean it. You’ll get yours. And even you don’t, aren’t you glad they did? Appropriate replacement: gratitude. Show gratitude for what others have and also gratitude for what you have – even if it isn’t a month in Fiji or a new wardrobe or standing manicures.
  • Sorry. I’ve talked about this before. Don’t say sorry unless you’ve done something worthy of apologizing for. Appropriate replacement: excuse me, pardon me, thank you.
  • Starving. This is one I think my mom said to me a lot that’s stuck with me. You are definitely not starving. You are very hungry. You are regular hungry. You might even be thirsty. But you are not starving. This is more of a mindset. In addition, please everyone stop getting so hangry all the. Be a responsible adult and carry a snack in your purse like the smart people do. (I need to take my own advice on this one often.) Appropriate replacement: Hungry. Very hungry. Hangry.

What do y’all think? Are there words you try to use less? Do you try to put more meaning behind your words as you get holder?

What is hidden here safe in my chest

Happy New Year, chickadees! As you may or may not, I love New Year’s. I love a fresh start, I love a list of goals, I love moving into a new year and a new space. I love the reset button.

First up, here’s a review of last year’s goals:

  • read 52 books – I read 23 books this year…this was a lofty one that I knew I probably wouldn’t make.
  • find more free time for walking, wandering, laughing, sunshine, giggling, and Scrabble – I’d like to think that I did this…and continue to do this.
  • run 300 miles – The summer was hella hot. We moved. I ran 230 miles. I consider this a win since it’s more than 2014.
  • do an unassisted headstand – check, check!
  • reevaluate my recipe wheelhouse – Did this, but also traveled a LOT and relied on old standbys. Will work on this again in 2016.

So what are we doing this year, you ask? Here are some of my goals:

  • Read 25 books – Obviously I didn’t make my 52 goal, and I want to be realistic. Here’s to reading more this year now that we have a house and are not looking every weekend!
  • Free time/relaxation/etc – Always, always working on this one.
  • Run 300 miles – Now that I have a half under my belt, running a couple miles three or four times a week is a piece of cake – so let’s get to 300!
  • Do an unassisted handstand – This will be hard, but I want to get there. I am working on this already, starting today, and I have a lot of good work ahead, so I am excited about this one!
  • New recipes, always, forever.  My kitchen is no longer baby sized. I have a dishwasher. I want to get at it this year. Suggestions, please!
  • Write on this blog once a week. – Keeping up GMS is a lot of work, but I want to write more about what’s going on in my life, even if it’s just for me. This is where I journal most, and I want to update more often on what I’m feeling and not just what I am cooking.

Hope you’re having a good new year, and that you’re setting goals for yourself that you want to reach – or you’re committing to not setting goals! Love you kiddos!

friday nights.

Friday nights are for walking steps in your living room catching up on Parenthood until you reach 10,000 steps so you can eat an enchilada and binge watch Law & Order: SVU.

Friday nights are for attempting tripod yoga and pull ups and forearm balance and for Pinteresting yoga poses that you want to attempt someday, someday maybe.

Friday nights are for finding new recipes to try at home, for having two squares of dark chocolate just because, and for catching up on a swath of food blogs that I don’t normally have a chance to read.

Friday nights are for avoiding crickets that are crawling around in your apartment and then learning the consequences of that (as I type this I hear the cricket creaking in my kitchen faster and faster as though it was 100 degrees out.)

Friday nights are for promise. The promise of coffee in the morning. The promise of a wide-eyed weekend of cooking, and meeting new people.

Friday nights are for hope. Friday nights are everything wonderful about life.