Tag Archives: happening now

Coaching and me: a lesson in fairness, and losing.

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This picture showcases one of the hardest moments I’ve experienced in the past year or so. I am scrambling to pick five team members from my 20+ players to be the five shooters for our shootout. How do you choose a five year old, six year old, over another?

This weekend I had my last regular season game with my soccer team. Our coaches decided to have a game with all four teams together as two teams. I was the coach of my team (red) and the blue team. We played, screamed, played some more, got injuried, rocked ourselves back and forth, kissed elbows, rubbed knees, and quickly adhered bandaids to bleeding fingers.

After a forty minute game, we were tied nil-nil. So the coaches decided to have a shoot out. 5 players. Evening out the blue and red players. And, because I am the only female coach, making sure at least 2 of the 5 shooters were girls. I choose my top two boys, one from red, one from blue, two girls that had worked their hearts out during the game, and one blue girl that REALLY wanted a turn. I also chose a boy goalie, so we were 3-3 for boys-girls, and 3-3 red, blue.

This caused some ruckus with the kids: I didn’t exactly pick the best players. I picked the hardest working players. This caused the kids to become frustrated, which frustrated me. Why did we have to have a shoot out, anyways? Alas, even our best player didn’t make his shot, and we ended up losing the shoot out 0-1.

But I can tell you my kids cheered the loudest, and afterwards still wanted to know how to do a cartwheel and still wanted to tell me about their school days. Maybe I frustrated them by playing fair and letting us lose, but next week at the championship game, I bet the kids will update me on their math, reading, and favorite TV shows. And I bet they still smile and laugh. And this keeps me smiling, and content.

Dear Ms. Suleman, Dr. Phil

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Dear Ms. Suleman, and Dr. Phil,

I am concerned about the business venture you’ve begun. Ms. Suleman, It is no surprise that the public has latched onto your story and formulated its opinions. I also have my opinion: The birth of eight children into the world, given its current state, is irresponsible. I do believe you will care and love each of your children, but I wonder if you stopped to think of how you’d care for each of them when they were infants, toddlers, teenagers.

That said, it is not my life, and I don’t intend on imposing my beliefs on others. But I am sorry to hear that Dr. Phil has involved himself into your family’s story.

Dr. Phil, although I understand that Ms. Suleman needs financial and medical help and relief, I disagree with your venture to help raise money for her. Yes, those eight babies need care, love, and food. Yes, I believe someone should help them.

But using your fame, TV show, and career to benefit a woman who made (what some see as an unwise) choice to have eight children (adding to her six she already has) is unreasonable. In a world where stocks are tumbling, people are losing their homes, and there are already thousands of children homeless and malnourished, you are asking people to give a bit of themselves to someone who made a choice.

The choice was Ms. Suleman’s to make, and her doctor’s. Her doctor let her down by allowing the procedure to happen in the first place. But you will be letting her down, and America down, by allowing her unwise choice to continue to manifest by asking us for a handout.

Ms. Suleman has a home, and friends and family. She has a support system. She doesn’t need America’s attention, too. Americans shouldn’t be asked to help out this woman. Ms. Suleman made her life, and others shouldn’t be asked to clean up after her.

Dr. Phil, you should spend your time helping the hopeless, those who truly need it, not helping a woman who has made a media-spectacle of her family.

Ms. Suleman, you’ve made your bed. You know the rest.

Dr. Phil, I’m disappointed. I’d expect more from any doctor.

Thank you,

Jennie